I don’t know about Meri, but I’ve certainly had quite a few people at work and in other social situations ask the standard, “So how’s married life treating you?” question. Every time, my answer is the same: a halfway-confused response of, “Well… the same as it was before, but with a ring on.”
I wonder how much of the standard, American perception of married life is based on reality, how much of it comes from media (and more specifically, TV shows like The Simpsons and Married With Children), and how different we may or may not be from all of that.
Is it really such a struggle? Is there really so much faux-animosity? Am I just too young and naive, still?
The optimistic side of me realizes that our situation is probably quite different than most others. We’ve been a couple for eight years, have lived together for the last four, and didn’t even get engaged until less than a year ago. There are no secrets, no surprises, no false expectations.
Anyone that knows us is well aware of how much we enjoy spending time together, and generally have little interest in persuing separate “girls nights” or “guys nights”… we’re together with everyone, and that’s the way we like it.
We had something in our wedding ceremony about marriage being a union of two people, yet those two people retain their individuality and respect for that and blah blah blah. It was one of the pieces that I wasn’t fully 100% on agreeing with, but I didn’t particularly disagree with it, either. I just wasn’t sure that it perfectly explained how we are together. (If that was the least of my concerns with all the wording, I’d say that’s a pretty good thing :P)
So what’s the point of all this? I’m not entirely sure, myself. The curious side of me is thoroughly intrigued to see if the supposedly-naive side of me is correct in thinking that we’ll never be one of those couples making lame jokes about how different marriage is down the road, getting on each others’ nerves, etc.
Of course, I can’t possibly predict how things change if/when children enter the picture.
For now, though… yeah, it’s the same. But with a ring on. Which I’m finally used to wearing and am not constantly fiddling with.